[Hellboy has his own conflicted feelings about the idea, the same as how he had conflicted feelings when Abe found him on the deck of the Charon -- and when he found him bleeding on the train platform. The latter even moreso, really; he now knows that there is basically no way he'll ever be able to go back to the Bureau. He doesn't belong to that world anymore. And so, he'll probably never see Abe again.]
don;t know never tried texting one of the xzombie people, maybe those bounce bsck too
[Tali doesn’t have the fact of knowing Abe back home to look at, though she does know full well that if Abe is gone from here, she will never see him again. COMPASS are the only link she and any of her friends here have, and it sickens her whenever it occurs to her again, like it does now.
And Abe in particular – the closest and longest friend she’s made here – him not being around any more hurts, hurts more than she thought it ever would. The feeling of being happy for him mixes with it like oil and water – which is to say, the two don’t mix, and are always going to be confusing, and it’s just an oily, grim thing all around.
Suffice to say, if he’s gone, she’s going to miss him pretty damn bad. There are long pauses between texts, not sure how to communicate it and, for a moment, not sure she knows what she’s communicating.]
i don’t know anybody who’s turned into one of them. I don’t think I do. [And... actually, very much hopes she doesn't.]
You okay?
[Hellboy is free to interpret this question as a general 'are the zombies causing problems' or 'tell me your Fish Feelings'. Deliberately open question.]
[Wow, who even has fish feelings? Certainly not Hellboy, that's for sure.
For a very long time, there is no response. Minutes. Maybe half an hour.]
Peachy
[He's taking his frustrations out on these terrible, nearly-human bladed things. It actually feels good to be able to do that again -- the last time he'd done it, he'd charged headfirst into a Russian zombie army, which didn't turn out that well. And before that, there was the time on the Charon, after learning about Roger, after feeling helpless and guilty and very much like he was slowly drowning. And that's when his body wasn't acting as it should, and he probably would have died too if he'd kept it up for much longer.
But now... he don't have to worry about any of that. His body heals normally now, so he can deal with whatever these horrible thing can dish out.]
[Tali's frustrations aren't so easily taken out. Sure, there are the warped approximations of life lurking around every corner and they do need to be killed when she can't simply avoid them, but it's not so easy for her that she can just do it as catharsis. There's too much risk and not enough ammo.
Besides, for all her three-digit kill count since meeting Shepard years ago, it's never felt like anything more than a necessity. Usually a sad one.]
minus the apparitions, this place is almost like home.
[Which is a class act of a diversion, good job. Quite a long while later - whenever she has a break in ducking and dodging and fighting or maybe just whenever she gets up the nerve to say it:]
i hate hoping people come back. Especially this bad.
oh my god "he don't have to," shoots self in the face
[Hellboy's own apparitions are things he doesn't want to talk about. He won't even admit he's seeing anything because he knows they're not real and he absolutely refuses -- refuses -- to talk about things that are not real on principle. Things that are trying to get inside his head; spirits or possessed rocks or just pure evil that permeates this godforsaken scrap of floating metal. It didn't matter. He refused to allow it to be part of his reality, no matter how much pleading and admonishing and existing it did.
There's a pause between Tali's text and Hellboy's response, but it's more in line with his usual awkward hesitation than anything else.]
he doesn't deserve to be here. Whatever was eating him, he wasn't going to get over it here. I didn't until iwent home.
[Not that he is completely over the mysterious Thing that had him all fucked up for a majority of his time on the Charon. But he's doing much, much better than before. He imagines it will be the same for Abe; he won't be able to move on from his problems until he's back where he belongs, back in reality.]
[Tali is not so good at blocking out the ghosts, the hallucinations, whatever they are. They walk where she walks, fight when she fights, speak when the silence is otherwise enough to drive her insane. And sometimes the things they say are not things she ever wanted to hear.
But she can't just block them out or pretend they aren't there.]
I know. He's better off.
[Time works in funny ways here. Not just in the classical sense, but in the way that things just aren't so easily gotten over when you know they're waiting for you when you one day return, exactly as you left them. They freeze, and if they froze in an ugly place there's no thawing them and letting them go. It's just a matter of how well you can suspend them in your mind - if you can at all.]
Don't mind me. I just never get used to this.
[She has, if anything, gotten used to the fact that there is no getting used to people leaving. Bittersweet just doesn't quite cover it.]
[Who taught her how to use the network, he's gonna punch somebody....!!!]
oh. Ok, well... if you die here, you can come back to life. That's how it worked on the ship, anyway. It's never happened to me so i don't know what it's like or anything.
[Of course, he knows several people who have died while under the thrall of COMPASS, so they'd have a better idea of what actually happened. What it felt like.
Not like he's going to mention any of them to her.]
i hope this isn't going to lead you to start jumping off buildings or something. Dying probably still hurts a whole lot.
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w5 d7 ; i am late oops
MESSAGE: have you seen abe?
how dare you
messages keep bouncing back
Wow so welcoming
[There's a very long pause. She's trying to sort out her thoughts, and not having much luck.]
if he's just gone home that's fine
[it is very categorically not fine at all, but what else can she say?]
I was worried he got caught by those zombies.
[Dead or gone. It's a hell of a choice.]
[nods]
don;t know
never tried texting one of the xzombie people, maybe those bounce bsck too
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And Abe in particular – the closest and longest friend she’s made here – him not being around any more hurts, hurts more than she thought it ever would. The feeling of being happy for him mixes with it like oil and water – which is to say, the two don’t mix, and are always going to be confusing, and it’s just an oily, grim thing all around.
Suffice to say, if he’s gone, she’s going to miss him pretty damn bad. There are long pauses between texts, not sure how to communicate it and, for a moment, not sure she knows what she’s communicating.]
i don’t know anybody who’s turned into one of them. I don’t think I do. [And... actually, very much hopes she doesn't.]
You okay?
[Hellboy is free to interpret this question as a general 'are the zombies causing problems' or 'tell me your Fish Feelings'. Deliberately open question.]
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For a very long time, there is no response. Minutes. Maybe half an hour.]
Peachy
[He's taking his frustrations out on these terrible, nearly-human bladed things. It actually feels good to be able to do that again -- the last time he'd done it, he'd charged headfirst into a Russian zombie army, which didn't turn out that well. And before that, there was the time on the Charon, after learning about Roger, after feeling helpless and guilty and very much like he was slowly drowning. And that's when his body wasn't acting as it should, and he probably would have died too if he'd kept it up for much longer.
But now... he don't have to worry about any of that. His body heals normally now, so he can deal with whatever these horrible thing can dish out.]
what about you
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Besides, for all her three-digit kill count since meeting Shepard years ago, it's never felt like anything more than a necessity. Usually a sad one.]
minus the apparitions, this place is almost like home.
[Which is a class act of a diversion, good job. Quite a long while later - whenever she has a break in ducking and dodging and fighting or maybe just whenever she gets up the nerve to say it:]
i hate hoping people come back. Especially this bad.
oh my god "he don't have to," shoots self in the face
There's a pause between Tali's text and Hellboy's response, but it's more in line with his usual awkward hesitation than anything else.]
he doesn't deserve to be here. Whatever was eating him, he wasn't going to get over it here. I didn't until iwent home.
[Not that he is completely over the mysterious Thing that had him all fucked up for a majority of his time on the Charon. But he's doing much, much better than before. He imagines it will be the same for Abe; he won't be able to move on from his problems until he's back where he belongs, back in reality.]
i actually didn't even notice
But she can't just block them out or pretend they aren't there.]
I know. He's better off.
[Time works in funny ways here. Not just in the classical sense, but in the way that things just aren't so easily gotten over when you know they're waiting for you when you one day return, exactly as you left them. They freeze, and if they froze in an ugly place there's no thawing them and letting them go. It's just a matter of how well you can suspend them in your mind - if you can at all.]
Don't mind me. I just never get used to this.
[She has, if anything, gotten used to the fact that there is no getting used to people leaving. Bittersweet just doesn't quite cover it.]
and now you will forever because i brought it to your attention
see, just pretend your typos were deliberate and no one will question
that doesn't even make sense!!
no it totally does
no!!!
yessssss (i've forgotten what we're even talking about)
w6 d5 i just couldnt resist
MESSAGE: hey youre not in your room and i had a question
[God, how dare you not be available and right there in your room when she wants to interrogate you.]
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What's up kiddo?
i'm so sorry
what happens when you die here?
and don't you dare give me a catholic bedtime story.
w o w
uh
well]
why are you asking?
kanyeshrug
what's it talking about
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oh. Ok, well... if you die here, you can come back to life.
That's how it worked on the ship, anyway. It's never happened to me so i don't know what it's like or anything.
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seriously? not like night of the living dead or anything
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[Of course, he knows several people who have died while under the thrall of COMPASS, so they'd have a better idea of what actually happened. What it felt like.
Not like he's going to mention any of them to her.]
i hope this isn't going to lead you to start jumping off buildings or something. Dying probably still hurts a whole lot.
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is that how you americans spell ax
either one is acceptable actually!!!! american english: dumb
this language omg
pretty much we like Zs and we hate Us
gawd what did they ever do to you
everything
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W9 D4
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you probably noticed that sandstorm can cut through anything
[In other words, don't get shredded and let her know you're safe. Because if she doesn't nag him, he won't do it.]
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[He means pocket watch. Also, it's a joke.]
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good, thats what I was worried about
now i can sleep tonight
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weer you down here last week? do you know if theres water anywhere
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are you ok
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